Monday, 7 December 2009

Fictional obituaries.

(Listening to - Pink - Just Like A Pill)

They shoulda known it was coming. Everyone knows that people with no last name (or first name in O'Hearn's case) snuff it first in books/films.

In this case - outside of the first draft - they'll never have existed in the first place.

Name : Sheba.
Species: Cat.
Age: 3 months.
Reason for removal: Let's be honest, sweetie, you served no real purpose whatsoever, besides giving the MC a soft side (lazy characterisation on my part) and a reason to go the bar (lazy plotting). I'll keep you in mind for when I need a pet in a later project. I may rename you though, as Sheba never really worked.

Name: O'Hearn.
Species: Human.
Age: 34
Reason for removal: You also only served two purposes. Comic relief (unnecessary, given the new - and better - direction the MC will take without you there) and a babysitter for the now non-existent cat. Sorry buddy. If I need a scruffy space-ship mechanic in the future, I'll give you a bell.

*Cough*

Anyway. How is everyone? Me? I'm doing ok, ta. My back's nearly back to normal now (after a month of pain), and I've only another week to wait till my sweetie gets her new PC and I can see her on webcam again. *Happy dance.*

I might even venture into the attic tonight and retrieve the Christmas tree. I'm not big into decorations, but my mum loves 'em, and that's a good enough reason for me.

Since the question at the end of my last post worked so well, I'll ask another:

What are your plans for this time of year? Going anywhere? Staying home? Eating lots? Drinking lots?

TTFN,

Adam

(From now on, my sci-fi novella will be referred to as "Strand")

19 comments:

Janna Qualman said...

It's important to clean out and get rid of things (or characters) once in a while, isn't it? Everything becomes more spacious, more clear. That helps at home, and within a manuscript.

We stay home for Christmas. That is, we don't travel out of state. We'll home hop to my parents', and also have my husband's family thing at our house. And yes. I eat a lot. :)

Who's the lovely lady on your background?

Adam said...

It is indeed! It's going to take a fair amount of work to "fix" the MS, but I know the book will be better for it. :-)

We also stay at home for Christmas. My family is pretty anti-social most of the time, and more so over the holidays. ;)


Adam

(The lovely lady is Dichen Lachman, an actress of small fame.)

Bethany Wiggins said...

I merge a lot of first-draft characters into one. They don't die that way, just... morph into something more feasible. Happy tree-decorating!

Adam said...

Thanks! These are un-morphable, so they must be moidered instead. ;-)

Adam

Melanie Avila said...

I love this way of honoring the fallen characters. :)

I've never actually cut a character, but I think I write on the sparse side in terms of people. I'm actually thinking I might need MORE people, but I'll leave it alone for now.

As you know, I'm going HOME! Yay!

Adam said...

These are my first two casualties, barring a character I created that never even made it into a first draft, but he doesn't count as he's now the MC of his own story. ;)

YAY for going home! :D

Adam

Lost Wanderer said...

I love this post. Obituaries idea is so cool :-)

I will be here for Christmas, but going to USA to visit my parents on 27th.

Erica said...

Farewell Sheba and O'Hearn. Moment of silence... okay. I haven't gotten rid of anyone big yet, but I do have a cat in my WIP ruh roh- maybe I should take a look at why he's there!

For me- I'm staying home. I work in a mall office, so I will be working on Christmas Eve. Spending Christmas w/ my family and in-laws. I did take 10 days off in January! Should give me ample time to revise my WIP. Woo Hoo!

Now- go get that tree out and get those lights shinin' :o)

bettielee said...

I am going to see if I can skip Christmas this year. I hate driving up to my sisters, and if there is snow - I will get caught in a snowdrift. My car is too tiny and I nearly got blown off the damn highway on the drive home.

and by the way, I am finally going to do the "how did you become a writer" post. :)

Adam said...

LW - Thanks! Enjoy your visit! :D

Erica - My other novella also has a kitty. He's a more rounded character though, so hopefully I won't need to get rid of him too. We shall see...

Yay for January hols!

Bettielee - Tell 'em you've got swine flu. They won't want you anywhere near then. :-P

Can't wait to read your "how I became a writer" post! :D



Adam

April W said...

RIP

Adam said...

Hehe, thanks April. :D

Adam

shadowferret said...

We will be going to relatives, which is a nice change of pace. Usually they come HERE and destroy the place! Then we have to clean, and spend money we don't have on food and drinks.

Adam said...

Hehe, be sure to wreck the joint. ;D

Adam

Kaity Hall said...

hehe, kill the cat.

RIP, characters.

My roomie and I will spend Christmas at her parent's house and I will be pet sitting for a friend.

Much eating and drinking will ensue, along with merry gift-giving and much enjoyment.

~KK~

Kathy said...

Plans for Christmas?

We stay put. All my relatives live here in R.I.

This will be the first time in many years there will be no family Christmas get-together on my husband's side. His mother died this past May. It was always her party--her gift to her children.

So, a little sad this year. Both my husband and I lost our moms this year.

Adam said...

Kaity - Sounds good! I love pets around Xmas. Lots of time to cuddle. :-)

Kathy - I'm sorry to hear that. I hope that you manage to have a good time.

Adam

C. D. Yates/Cynthia Brayden-Thomas said...

Animals in stories always have to be accounted for. And you can't forget to feed them; even fictionalized pets can starve to death.

"Page 211: And they would have lived happily ever after...except for the putrid odor of Miss Lovey Kitty's carcass. She'd been sitting on the windowsill since page 3 and they'd forgotten about her. So they had a funeral, instead. The End."

Dear God. You should be happy your editor isn't editing right now. She's taken a leave of her senses. And her good taste...meow.

Adam said...

Haha, love it! :D

Very good point, too. ;)


Adam