Thursday, 19 January 2012


The 'Adam Definition' of spoiler is "One or more facts that, when told by some big ole arse, completely remove the point of reading or watching something." This counts triple if it's something with a twist, like with the ending of The Sixth Sense. Never seen it, never will, since I know the twist. Hence the SPOIL part of the term.

Some people don't give a damn about spoilers. My grandmother, for instance, used to turn to the last page of a book before she started it, to check if she'd like it. I also have friends who look up the synopsis of a movie before they watch it. I think it's safe to say, in fact, that most people view spoilers as an irritant, but not the end of the world. I'm a little more militant.

If you spoil something for me, not only will I probably not read/watch the media in question, I will also assault you with whatever blunt implement I can lay my hands on.

There are two reasons for my anger -

  1. The creator of said media has put in hundreds, if not thousands, of hours to create a piece of work that is designed to entertain you for a small fraction of those hours. Telling me that Dave the Crotchless Supermonkey dies on page 156 pisses all over the creator's efforts to entertain. What's the point in reading the book if you know what's going to happen?
  2. It's a dick move. You're basically saying, "I don't respect you enough to let you enjoy this media in the manner in which it was intended." Seriously now, why would you do this? Do you get some perverse enjoyment from ruining someone else's fun?
Also, I disagree with the idea that, if something has been out for a while, it's okay to spoil the plot. Why would this be okay? There aren't enough hours in my life to read the books released in one year, never mind everything that came before. Just because you read something thirty years ago doesn't mean you have a right to spoil it for everybody else.

It boils down to this: I want to enjoy media in the way it was intended to be enjoyed. If you try and spoil that for me, don't be surprised when you get shouted at.

What about you? What's your view on spoilers?




graceunderpressure said...

spoilers suck. except one: in the Bible, we win- Satan loses. :D

yes, some people DO get perverse enjoyment out of ruining other people's fun. what a sad, lonely life they must live.

Some people spoil accidentally. They are just so overjoyed with the book/film/wh.ev that they can't help telling you all the exciting stuff they read/saw. Childlike, they assume you will never ever ever ever see it yourself (if you've even heard of it before, which they doubt). :D

Hang in there, Adam. Lots of stuff to read/watch yet..

I kinda like books/movies that don't have twists too. They are harder to ruin.

Mike Crate said...

I avoid spoilers at all costs and for the most part those that know me respect that but it difficult these days especially with mainstream media. They take the view that people will pay to learn what is going to happen in their chosen entertainment and well sod the rest of us:(

Adam said...

Grace - I'll let you off with that one, but only because I didn't want to read that book in the first place. ;)

Twistless books certainly help, yes. They're better rereads, too, since it's easier to forget details.

Mike - *High five* We should form some sort of anti-spoiler crime-fighting team. I'll bring the spandex.


June Kramin said...

I know people that read the back page of a book too. I don't even read the back cover. I like surprise. I was never a present shaker either & I never wanted to know the sex of my children. I don't understand people wanting to take the fun out of things. Its worse when they don't understand this enough not to spoil it for you. Sorry, love.
No worries in Dustin Time 2. The butler didn't do it ;)

Adam said...

People be crazeh.

I read the back cover of books, but sometimes regret it. Most are pretty vague, and just give you an idea of what's happening, but some spoil the damn plot. >.<


Red said...

I will violently struggle to avoid spoiling things for others. If I'm afraid I'll be giving something away, I check quick, "wait, have you seen/read that?" and will only spoil if I'm fairly certain they never will see/read the movie or book in question.

...I always read the back cover though, and the first few pages if I'm considering purchasing a book.

Adam said...

That's what I do, too. I couldn't bear the fact that I'd spoiled a book for someone, so I try very hard to keep my mouth shut, no matter how awesome/terrible the spoiler happens to be. :-)